The only reason I watch the TV show The Voice

When my wife and I were younger, and just dating we used to set up role play scenarios on yahoo chat. This was back in the heyday of yahoo chat when it had user created rooms and way less monitoring.

We were both 19 at the time, but more often than not she would "play" 16. They way it usually went is I would get on cam and just chat with people that had similar interests as myself. Usually get on cam for them. The cover story was that I was home for the weekend from school. No one was home except my 16 year old sister, and she was busy doing whatever girls do. At some point, usually while I was masturbating, my wife would open the door behind and watch. I'd play like I didn't know what was going on until the guy/couple I was talking with mentioned she was there.
From there we would play it a few different ways. Sometimes I'd get really embarrassed and she would be the initiator. Sometimes I'd invite her over. In the end it usually ended up with her blowing me or me fucking her.

One of the more extreme scenarios we put on was I chatted up this older guy that had a thing for younger chicks. I gave him my wife's or..."sister's" ID and told him to chat her up and see what she was doing online. After a few times he "got her" to strip for him. I told him to set it up so that some weekend I would be home and he would get her to bate for him, I'd come in so I could see it. He did this, and as I came in the room and saw my wife played like she was shocked and wanted me to leave. She played that she was incredibly pissed at me for seeing. I ran up on her, threw her on the bed and "raped" her. When I was done I pulled out and shot on her face.
Afterward she just turned off her computer without saying anything and never talked to the guy again. I let it go for a week and signed on my account to chat with him. He was elated. Kept calling me his hero. I told him she loved it so much she was my fuck slave now, and let him watch us fuck one more time.

I confess, I miss those times. We looked close enough alike that no one really questioned it. And my wife, while not all that skinny, had smaller boobs, so no one questioned her age either. Now, we're old/fat/parents. OK, not really all that old, or all that fat. But it would be harder for people to believe us as siblings as opposed to a couple. Plus, my wife got out of that. I tried role playing it a while and she stopped me before I could. For her, it was more about the show, not the sexual idea of siblings. Which is fine. But now she won't even get on cam or show off anymore. Stupid marriage and kids.

Some people call me a hero, I have no problems with that. It helps with the ladies when you say you've rescued people, saved lives, made a real difference in the world. They lap that shit up like puppies with milk. I don't do it for the pussy, and I don't do it for the accolades. Truth is, right now, I don't know why I do it.

There's a scene in the new Superman movie, and Superman's mum says "save the world if you want, or don't do anything if you don't - you don't owe them a damn thing". I've been thinking about that line recently, ever since I saw the trailer. I've lived my life by the Uncle Ben philosophy, that with great power comes great responsibility. There's something noble about using your gifts to save lives, there's a sense of moral obligation when you are as massively well-endowed as myself. I've lived my life according to that philosophy for as long as I can remember, but now, I'm tired.

You might wonder what I do that makes me so great. So I'll tell you. I'm a gigolo, a male prostitute. I'm one of the best in the business. I make women come, and come hard. I make women get in touch with their bodies and orgasm like a slut. I give them my time and and concern, and in return, they give me a lot of money. So I'm rich beyond my lifestyle, and I have a fulfilling job that makes people happy. No one gets hurt, it's all happy smiles and laughter.

But lately, I've been thinking that there must be more to life. I live in the shadows, basically. At parties, when people ask me what to do, I'm momentarily speechless, and then I lie. I tell them I do charity work, build homes in 3rd world countries and shit like that. I lied like that so many times that I actually started going out to do it, just so I knew what I was talking about. And now that's my life. I build homes for dirt-poor communities, hook them up with solar power for heating and water. I love it, it's rewarding in a way that's socially acceptable. I've pretty much stopped my prostitution business except for a few long-term clients who wouldn't be able to cope without my visits.

But even then, it's hard to do this for the rest of my life. So I've decided to be Batman. I want to run around town in a hood and cape and beat the crap out of evil-doers. I'm rich enough to mod my car into the batmobile. Does anyone want to join me?

when i'm in a rock band, i;m gonna do a cool, mellow song. then in the middle i'll stop and announce "this part is just to be an asshole to the people playing guitar hero" and then flail wildly on the strings for 30 seconds.

Anton Lavey was the greatest person who ever lived and was a hero.

Question for you: what would you do in my situation?

My wife has recently picked up a sexual appetite way beyond her normal one. I mean, from once a month or less, to every night. I know she's going through a mid-life crisis, and she's challenging herself in every way possible - especially sexually. She's gone from very vanilla to, well, a lot less vanilla, but not anywhere near as kinky as I'd like, but hey - it's a very pleasant change.

I've found out that her appetites have changed about the same time as she's started having a bit of a thing for a work colleague. She's clearly interested, as is he - and I suspect that sooner or later it'll develop into an affair, if I'm honest. Now the sex doesn't really bother me - one of my kinks would be to get more into the whole swing/swap scene, but the dishonesty/emotional connection side of things does have more of a concern for me. I'm all for her fucking other guys, but only for the fucking, not because of the deeper side of things - which I worry is more what she's looking for. Clearly I'm not fulfilling something in her life, but after 8 years of marriage I guess the romance gets replaced with a comfort thing, which can be easily overlooked in favour of a new guy with a poem and a bunch of cheap flowers.

Her friends have talked to me because I think they recognise she's on the verge of going "off the rails" and, in their own words, it's not because of something I've done, but just because she's hit that point in her life where she's wanting to go crazy. I'm an innocent bystander, they say. They want me to come over all the romantic hero, and sweep her off her feet so she stays loyal: but the kinky dog in me wants something else :)

Personally I'm no angel. I've been with prostitutes; I've slept around on one night stands; I've hooked up with people I've met on work conferences and screwed around. So don't picture me as the guy on the moral high ground. No way.

My personal thought on all this is: I don't care if she screws around, and I might get her to agree to some kinky shit that I've wanted to do for some time (threesomes, foursomes, outdoor group sex with strangers and more). I might think about discussing an open relationship with her, which she might actually go for as she'd be given by me an open invite to follow up on the attraction she's got with the guy from work.

So - what would you dirty minded fuckers do? (and it makes a change that there's nobody under-aged involved, which disappoints me deeply: I love "fucking reported" guy and hope he posts on my thread just for me). Thanks, pervs.

Whoever said this is my hero.

Any good halloween movie deserves A happy ending, just not always for the hero but for the victimizer too. Like A glazed ham or the icing on the cake.

Birds will fall if Joe don't the shut the hell up i'maa a come out there and take ALL your acid! Gonna start out with shoorms. Why!?! Axe yo shelf why. You know why, I peeled my hat the dude. I came out here, I buffet my butt, I tried to please the people, I tried to give my child the bell. You think they smacked me up? Did Dole rack me up for a bell? NO! BOSE RACKED UP! The Cruise. Mike Cruise smacked me up. Yawn didn't pack me up. Why? Cuz i'm smarter than you! Did you packed me up Vin Muhma 'am? NO! Mike came back from my injury did you back me up for shutta da bill? Yeah. Martha Keene was gonna live no tender years, buddy didden!
He did em cuz he try to bee nye and bring peas and he got shot down four it, Tryda B. Knives. See Golden Farrah Khan? Is he dead? NO! Why? Cuz he don't wanna preach to Pete. He tell it like a this. My enimies neccessary. But I tell you what, you and your super hero the other taker, Dad man the snuff. This is for you, like I sad before, you your az$ on me you won't be gettin up! Chez remember the cat too. Are you a Sid again?

Thanks again to the gent who uploaded his smoking hot girlfriend. You're a hero.

My hero 👅🐽